Everything IS CONNECTED!!

Wonderment, I live in a state of WOW!!  Bubbles don't die on wet grass!  Barter Faire was WET in 2012!!!

It's 2013.  Somehow, I'm not surprised that the shifts predicted for emergence into the Age of Aquarius are subtle, smooth for the most part, and calming like a dip in fresh warm water.  I have noticed a few things.  My perspective is much different, but this has been a transition that has been the result of much deep introspection over the last two years in particular.  Not that I just began this internal process, oh no - far from it.

Over the summer, I found myself at an extremely familiar place.  A precipice, if you will, that I have stood at the edge of many times.  My mind sees it as a canyon, to which I would very much like to cross to the other side of, but there is no bridge, and the chasm is deep; the space wide.  I stand there longing for what I know to be "the future" on the other side of that split in the ground, knowing what I have always known; that if I just take the first step out there into what seems like thin air, a rock will come to greet my feet and this will continue as long as I keep walking, all the way to the other side.  I have been here in my dreams so many times.... it's so exciting to actually be able to see The Other Side! Each time I come here, I am right on the brink of embracing my gifts.  But for some unknown reason, or fear, I have never stepped out.  It's never been that I didn't believe in the "bridge" that would appear, or am afraid of what is at the bottom of the canyon.  Today, I know what it's been about all along.

The Other Side is Me.  The expanse is Being Alone.  I was never afraid of falling.  I was afraid of walking across alone.  Every time I went there, I was alone.  I spent my whole life avoiding being alone.  I'm alone.. almost 6 months now.  I have found myself.  I feel so balanced, and my stress level is lower than I ever imagined.  I feel free, free from the prison I created for myself.  Free from the constant fear of being alone.  Free from "the search" for "the one", for I may have already experienced him in this existence, and I will settle for nothing less than what I had and lost so abruptly.  Free from the dream of walking hand in hand on the beach, or sitting with my love on the porch in our rocking chairs.  I don't have to chase that anymore.  I am fine all by myself.  In fact, I am better than all the descriptions of fine... I'm awesome, I'm excited about finding out more about who I am and I am content.

I looked for Serenity, Sanctuary, and Solace not to a place - but to people.  I needed to look inside myself.  But I was too busy trying to be a part of someone else to know who that was.  I was the oldest.  I was a leveler, and a people pleaser most of my life, and when my parents divorced I became parentified, as my mother didn't even know how to balance a checkbook when I was nine years old and they divorced.  She is an alcoholic, with MPD tendencies, and battled Chrone's Disease, and Breast Cancer - I was a co-dependent before i ever left home.

I've always known somehow that everything is connected.  That we are all a part of something bigger, that we are an expression of god.  I'm sure of it now.  I'm no longer afraid of the transition of my energy from this body, as when I became a widow in 2008 - evidence proved to me that there is no death of "me", only my body will expire.  Without fear of death... I find there is no fear at all... because if the worst thing that can happen to one is death, and it's just a transition into another form... what's to fear?  Nada people, nada.

So, today I start this blog to share my thoughts about connection.  You will find that I love to connect things, people, yarn, fiber, thoughts, hearts, Legos and Lincoln Logs!!!

You might find all kinds of things here.  Contests, surveys, links, art, crafts, DIY, spirtual awakening, Fire Spinning, Drum Circles, Singing Bowls, Fesitivals - It's all about CONNECTIONS!!